“What you are afraid of is never as bad as what you imagine. The fear you let build up in your mind is worse than the situation that actually exists.”

– Spencer Johnson

So true.

For me, fear causes anxiety and agitation. It brings about an overwhelm sometimes to the point of immobility. It is defined as an unpleasant, often strong emotion, a disturbing or distressing feeling, evoked by impending danger, evil, or pain. But guess what? This impending threat doesn’t even have to be REAL.

I admit it. Most of my biggest fears are imaginary. The big “What if?” questions that swirl around in my head. But these imaginary scenarios are real to me, alright. I can ruminate on them, and let them completely immobilize me. That’s not really cool.

My daughter Lauren recently recommended a book to me called “Who Moved My Cheese?” by Spencer Johnson. And while this book is widely used in the corporate world to help people deal with change in the workplace, it has its place as well in the realm of personal relationships and individual development.

The book was an easy read, and I finished it in a few nights. Then I went online and listened to an audio version of the story. Yes, it resonated with me. It’s a parable-type of book. You read about mice and “little people,” and are left to ask yourself, who am I in this story? How do I react to change? Am I dealing with change in a way that is beneficial, or is there a way for me to handle things better? Is my fear surrounding this change healthy and motivating, or is it maybe unreasonable, or even debilitating?

“He knew sometimes some fear can be good. When you are afraid things are going to get worse if you don’t do something, it can prompt you into action. But it is not good when you are afraid that it keeps you from doing anything.”

-Spencer Johnson

Change happens all.the.time. It is inevitable. It is often unwelcome and scary. Sometimes it is a “good” change. But still. There is a degree of fear that will accompany change.

I try to assess my fears – often with the help of another – and to determine which fears are real and which ones are imaginary. I find that most of my fears are imaginary. I let my emotions run wild at times, and they need some rational reigning in. This takes some concentrated work on my part, but it is so worth it. The freedom from irrational fear is incredibly liberating.

“When you stop being afraid you feel good.”

– Spencer Johnson

So, just try. The next time you feel anxious and scared. Try to determine if your fears are based in reality, or are they those imaginary “what if’s”? If you do the work of scrutinizing the change, and tackling your fear, you will be on the path to feeling free! <3

Reference: “Who Moved My Cheese?” by Spencer Johnson Amazon or YouTube.